First it may be useful to define what premature ejaculation is. Although it may seem self explanatory, one problem may be that you or your partner’s expectation of sexual stamina, often nurtured by popular culture, are unrealistic.
Usually, premature ejaculation is diagnosed when a man frequently ejaculates sooner during intercourse than he or his partner wishes, either before penetration or shortly after.
If you do suffer from premature ejaculation there are behavioral approaches to the problem and medication. While medication, such as SSRI, may help – they are effective only while being taken. Once you stop taking the medication the effect also passes. The other downside of taking these medications is that you will need to cope with their side effects. This is why it is better to start with the behavioral methods rather than start with medication. Those can be added later if needed.
Contrary to common beliefs the behavioral approach does not involve either mental numbing, such as distracting yourself from the sensations, or physical numbing with some form of numbing cream. Somewhat surprisingly, the most successful approaches involve heightening your awareness to your physical sensations, while maintaining physical relaxation. Only by increased awareness and mindfulness, you can learn to regulate better your arousal level, and hence your ejaculation.
These two self help books teach the basic sex therapy techniques for dealing with this problem.
How to Overcome Premature Ejaculation
Coping With Premature Ejaculation: How to Overcome PE, Please Your Partner & Have Great Sex