I have decided to skip the usual list of links to major mental health websites. If you are looking for those, I highly recommend you start from the site of Michigan Mental Health Network . This site encompasses everything you may want to know about mental health in Michigan and beyond. It contains a directory of therapists, clinics and support groups in Michigan; an excellent list of links to mental health websites; and interesting articles for professionals and lay persons alike.

Another excellent resource is the website The guide to self help books. It contain a directory of books, arranged by different topics in self help, personal growth and self improvement areas.

I will dedicate this space to less known resources, that touched me deeply and influenced my life and my professional work.

This blog is not a substitute for professional advice on diagnosis or treatment of a mental health condition. Please consult with a professional before trying any of the ideas presented here.

If you have more recommendations along those lines, email me at mchll.samuel@gmail.com I’ll be more than happy to add them.

One area of his research is the influence of sexual excitation on our decision making. In order to use a reliable state of excitation he decided to compare questionnaires that people would answer in two states. One state was that of sexual arousal and the other was in a calm neutral setting. For his experiment he employed male heterosexual university students as his subjects.

The students were asked the same list of questions about their sexual behavior, once in a neutral setting, in a cafe. The second time they were instructed to masturbate in the privacy of their room, and when highly aroused, answer the same set of questions.

The questions centered around three subjects. The first was about willingness to experiment diversity of sexual behaviors. The second one was related to safe sex practice.  The third subject was how likely they were to engage in some form of unethical behavior in order to sleep with a woman. These questions went from taking a woman to a fancy restaurant to plying her with alcohol or even slipping the rape drug in her drink.

For all three subjects, the students were much more likely to give a positive answer when aroused. The first subject is interesting but not concerning. People are more willing to experiment sexually when they are aroused. The differences in response to the two following subjects are of much greater concern.

Some of the findings on the subject of safe sex and birth control:

“Would you always use a condom if you do not know the sexual history of a new partner” when not aroused, 88% answered yes. When aroused, it dropped to 69%.

“Birth control is the woman’s responsibility” When not aroused 34% when aroused 44%.

Some findings on the subject of unethical behavior:

“Would you encourage a date to drink to increase the chance she would have sex with you” –in a café,, 46% answered yes. Aroused, 63% agreed.

“Would you keep trying to have sex after your date says no “. In a calm state, 20% answered yes. When aroused – 45% said yes.

It seem that although we know that we may behave differently when aroused, we underestimate how strong this effect is. It is well worth remembering that what we perceive of as ethical or safe behavior when calm may be difficult to follow through with when sexually aroused, or possibly in any other strong emotional state.  This has many implications both for understanding our own risky behavior and in what we tell our children to be aware of and to avoid.

Based on Dan Ariely (2009): Predictably irrational. New York:  Harper publishing.

They ate the same amount.

When presented with fresh and stale popcorn in a different environment, a conference room, the two groups did not exhibit the same mindless eating.

The moral is that when you try to change habits, pay close attention to environmental cues and plan ahead,  rather than trying to rely on will power alone.

More about effective ways to change habits later.

Adapted from Neal & all  (2011): The pull of the past: When do Habits Persist despite conflict with Motives. In: Personality and social Psychology Bulletin, 37 (11) 1428-1439

Stress management is a set of skills used to reduce stress in our daily life.  A recent study by Dr. Epstein sheds new light on this concept.

Dr. Epstein looked at different skill sets associated with stress management. These skills are commonly taught in courses, coaching or psychotherapy. Dr. Epstein looked at three broad sets of skills.

1 .Preventing and managing the sources of stress. This includes proper organization of home and work space, good time management, and effective prioritization and planning of tasks.

Some of these skills are reactive, for example, I have just noticed how stressful overstuffed and disorganized my filing cabinet is. Some skills are proactive such as buying Christmas presents early thus avoiding last minute stress and long lines.

2. Relaxation skills. These skills are what many of us tend to think about as stress management tools. These include practices such as meditation Yoga and guided imagery

3. Cognitive coping skills. These include Reframing situations and control of irrational thought patterns.

To the surprise of the investigator, the most useful coping skills were those mentioned in the first category. Good organization, planning, and time management had the most benefit. The second category, of relaxation techniques, although useful, had less of an impact. Cognitive coping skills ranked last. Cognitive skills are very helpful when coping with depression but apparently less effective when dealing with stress.

Dr Epstein’s study shows that while it is nice to do yoga, meditation and other relaxation techniques, if you really want to manage your stress,  go back to basics. Organizing your physical environment, managing your time and prioritizing your tasks are all straightforward tools to reduce stress.

Managing your physical environment means that the pile of papers on your desk, the one next to the three coffee cups needs to go. You need adequate storage for you papers and other things.

Better management of time entails making realistic estimates of what you can and cannot do, so you will not stress yourself later.

Managing priorities can best be done with a good old “to do list”.  The list can be Hi-Tec or simple low-Tec pen and paper, as long as it lists all your tasks, and assigns priority to each. If you do your tasks according to their priorities, you will get ahead in your work. Plan your day in the morning. This way you will be more productive. Try and plan ahead for a week, a month, even a year.

After you have done all of these, you will probably have a time to do yoga. (And I am all for it…)

People that report better stress management skills, report feeling lower levels of stress, being happier, and being more productive and successful professionally. The good news is that these skills can be learned.

Adapted from Scientific American Mind October 2011, 31-35

* Dr Epstein actually defined four types of stress management skills. Since two of them overlap to a large degree, I grouped them under one heading.

(-:

The Rashomon effect is defined as the way in which different people may describe the same observed event in very different ways. This may happen while all observers of the event believe that they are being completely honest.

We are all familiar with this phenomenon to some degree, yet we are often uncomfortable when confronted with the extent  to which our personal perception is subjective, a lens through which we view reality.

This term originated in a movie by Kurosawa, a renowned Japanese director. In the movie four people meet in the forest; a young samurai, his beautiful wife, a bandit, and a passer-by. The young samorai is killed. The four people come to testify in the trial that follows, including the ghost of the samurai.  Strangely enough, three of them plead responsibility for the murder.  The event appears very differently in the story that is told by each of the four participants. Each of them is convinced that he or she is telling the truth, and the events are shown through the protagonists eyes.   In the movie there is no resolution.

Unfortunately, this happens all too often in relationships. When People describe  events that have led to a crises in a relationship, they often give completely different accounts of these events. Often the people involved are convinced that the other person is not telling the truth.

I often come across this phenomenon in my practice. When a couple is in a crisis and are recounting the events that led to the crises, it is critical to first accept that, as a rule,   no one in the room is lying. The next step is to  listen to each other carefully and try to understand what lens each person is using to view reality. Understanding the distortions that these lenses impose upon our perception, can provide us  clues on how to repair a relationships that is ailing.
It is often humbling to discover how subjective our perception is.

A new study by Dr. Nofzinger from the University of Pittsburgh School of Medicine brings a fresh and interesting approach to this problem. Dr. Nofzinger has built a device designed to cool a specific area of the brain while a person sleeps. The device consisted of a cap with circulating water that cools the prefrontal cortex, the area just behind the forehead.

The idea behind this approach is that insommnia is caused by hyper-arousal of the prefronal cortex, as has been shown in previous studies. This hyper-arousal is experienced by the  insomniac as excessive rumination, worries and  incessant thoughts.  Cooling this area  slows the metabolism  and reduces brain activity.

According to the study, 75% of the subjects reported better sleep – a higher percentage than any medication could accomplish.

I wonder if one could use simply one of those ice packs or eye masks you can buy in any drugstore…

Adapted from Scientific American Mind, November 2011 p. 11.

Among the many findings of the study that I found most compelling or surprising:

• The most important personality trait that predicts long life and health is being conscientious ;  being prudent and  persistent. This was a very statistically significant result. This runs counter to today’s accepted wisdom that optimism cheerfulness and lack of stress can lead to a longer life. You can be a dour contentiousness person and you statistically have a chance to live longer than the cheerful optimist.
•  Exercise in childhood and adolescence does not predict health and longevity later in life, but exercise  in middle age does. So even if you were a couch potato as a child, it is worth you while to start exercising at an older age.
• The happiness of husband in a marriage is a much better predictor of health and longevity of both  husband and wife, than the wife’s happiness. ( No explanation for that one, unfortunately.)
• A person’s social network is an important factor that contributes to one’s health and longevity. What counts is not how much you feel loved, but  how much you feel needed and the sheer volume of your social network.
• People that are accomplished in their career tend to live longer, even if they work very hard under stress for many years.
• A parent’s death,although traumatic and devastating  for a child, does not affect their longevity and health later. Divorce of parents does  have a detrimental effect on children’s health and longevity . That does not mean that couples “need to stay together for the children”. Living in a stressful environment is not good either.
•  A fulfilling sex life  predicts longevity, even after controlling for general happiness in the marriage.
•  Hand writing of future physicians and lawyers  was illegible relative to their peers even as children…

Food for thought.
The Longevity Project: Surprising Discoveries for Health and Long Life from the Landmark Eight-Decade Study

However, new studies point out that this is not the case. Actually, older adults tend to be happier than the middle aged. Curiously enough, this finding is true across many countries and cultures.

It appears  that happiness, measured in many different ways, is shaped like the letter “U” across life. People tend to be happy and hopeful starting their life as young adults, in their twenties. Than stress, and the disappointments of life take their toll. There is steady decline of happiness until middle age. Than something suprising happens: In spite of all the losses that age may bring, people start to feel happier. Even after controlling for income level, health and many other variables the distinctive U shape is maintained. The lower point of happiness, averaged across many people, is around the age of 46. Even more surprisingly, average happiness during old age surpasses that of early adulthood.

At first glance, a cynical observer may be excused for thinking that this is wishful thinking of a cohort of ageing baby boomer researchers. Taking a closer look, the research appears valid and is worth understanding.

There are a number of explanations that may clarify this trend. One explanation is demographic. The stress of raising children passes as they leave the house and life becomes calmer. But this explanation is not enough by itself. It seem that the growing happiness is a result of inner transformation.

As young adults we feel the need to prove ourselves and we are constantly and restlessly striving. As middle age advances, we become more accepting of the point we have reached in life. We are able to enjoy what we have with less constant frustration over what we have not attained.

Maybe this is what is called wisdom.

At a later age, in spite off losses around them, people enjoy and value their time, in spite of difficulties that age imposes, precisely because they do not take the time they have for granted. Older people are less concerned over what others may think of them. They use skills they acquired over lifetime: They are better at managing their emotions. They are much less angry and judgmental. They are better at managing conflicts, so their support system is better.

Happiness is a valid goal in itself. It also has tangible benefits. Happiness has been shown to lead to  a healthier and more productive life.

The question is,  how can we accelerate our path along the happiness curve without having to wait for the passage of time.

adapted from an article published in the Economist, December 18th, 2010.